Laura is going to KILL me for this subject line 😂

So, before I officially cement my place in the guestroom for the next few nights…

Let me go ahead and explain what I mean. 

It’s no secret between my wife and me that Selena Gomez is one of my celebrity crushes…

And occasionally, she’ll come up in conversation… or I’ll see her in a movie… or hear one of her songs…

And I’ll tease Laura about how in love I am with Selena. 

Of course, I’m not actually in love with Selena Gomez…

It’s just fun to tease Laura…

And I do think Selena is very talented. 

So anyway…

This morning, as I was drinking my coffee and reading the Wall Street Journal…

I came across an article titled, “The Ballad of Selena Gomez.” 

It’s a long piece about Selena and the things she’s been through…

And it had a lot of stuff about her that I didn’t know. 

For example, I remember hearing that she had lupus for a while…

But I didn’t know that it developed into a more serious condition that required her to get a kidney transplant in 2017. Or that there was a complication during the surgery and it ended up lasting 9 hours and she almost died. 

I also didn’t know that Selena has suffered from various mental health issues, including anxiety and depression. Or that she’s seen numerous therapists and gone to multiple in-patient treatment facilities for these issues. I was especially surprised when she said: “I got on the right medication, and my life has completely changed.” 

I’ve dealt with depression (never super severe) at various times in my life too, so I could relate to that….

But, what really resonated with me is the part about getting on the right medication. 

In November of 2018, I got re-diagnosed with ADD and decided to go on Adderall. It was a big and difficult decision for me – because I really try not to take “drugs.” But it has absolutely and utterly changed my life. I’m on a relatively small dosage, but it’s made a night and day difference. I’m more pleasant to be around, more attentive with my family, and have dramatically less social anxiety.

I need to write a whole article about my ADD in the future. But the point is, when I read that quote about medications from Selena, I totally got it. 

Also, while I knew Selena had a lot of Instagram followers, I didn’t realize she’d taken a year-and-a-half break at one point because: “I’d rather stay away from anything that’s going to make me feel like shit.” 

And I found it interesting that Selena’s not religious in the traditional sense, but does say of her spirituality that, “it’s about my faith and connection to God.” That’s how I approach spirituality too: I don’t go to Church, but I do cultivate a personal connection with God.  

Oh, and finally…

I liked hearing how Selena needs alone time, ideally a few hours each day, to fully recharge. Personally, I’m probably about 55% introvert, 45% extrovert. So I’m fine in social situations (especially now that my ADD is better managed), but it’s also very important that I get some downtime each day. 

Okay, so what’s my point?  

Well, as I was reading this article about Selena Gomez…

And learning all of these things about her…

I found myself thinking, “man, I love Selena Gomez!” 

But I didn’t mean this in a romantic way.

Or even in the sense that I was attracted to her.

She just seems really cool…

Like a badass…

Like someone, I could admire, because she’s gone through a lot and has a unique perspective on things…

She seemed like someone I could relate to.  

Now, here’s the part where I wave my magic wand and tie this all back to marketing and copy.

This article about Selena Gomez, and my response to it…

Reminds me yet again of why personal stories are so effective in our copy and marketing. 

Getting personal and vulnerable…

Being authentic and honest…

This is what allows our audience to truly become connected to us. 

If we tell our story well…

Then the reader will see parts of themselves in us…

Which, in turn, makes them feel less alone. 

That’s a powerful thing…

And when your audience truly feels understood…

It becomes so much easier for them to want to take action.

In fact, they’ll want to take action…

You don’t even have to ask them – they do it proactively because they like you. 

For me personally…

When I read this Wall Street Journal article…

It made me want to listen to Selena Gomez’s new album. 

Normally I would never do that since I don’t really listen to pop albums…

But now that I’ve read about Selena’s experiences……

And learned the stories behind some of her new songs…

I probably will put her album on at some point today…

Because now I’m curious and feel connected to her story. 

And, make no mistake about it…

That’s really what the point of this Wall Street Journal article was, to begin with.

It was to present Selena in a certain light…

And to expose her to an audience beyond her core demographic…

With the goal being that people would read this article and find Selena interesting…

And then go stream her music… or attend a concert… or watch one of her movies… or engage with her in some way.  

For me personally, at least, the article was effective…

But there was never any call-to-action in the article…

Nothing that said: “Click Here to Listen To the New Album NOW”…

And truthfully, there didn’t need to be… 

Because now that I know about Selena and her story…

It’s easy for me to want to support her. 

I’m going to be wrapping this up here in a second…

But the last point I want to make…

Is that this whole experience I’ve described…

Of reading Selena’s story…

Feeling more connected to her…

Then wanting to take an action…

It goes back to a concept I posted about a while ago in the Justin and Stefan Talk Copy Facebook Group…

Something I refer to as Emotional Response Marketing (ERM). 

This is marketing where, instead of getting people to take an external action (aka click here)…

We’re focused on getting them to have an internal reaction (a feeling). 

It can be hard for Direct Response Marketers to believe that feelings can be more important than clicks…

Yet I would argue that the former is much more valuable over time.

Because when it’s done right…

It leads to people taking an action not just once…

But over-and-over-and-over again. 

I’ll write more about ERM in the future…

But wanted to make a note about it here as well.

Okay, other than that, time to jump into my day. 

Doing some copy tweaks for the next hour…

Then I have some meetings with members of my call center…

And then this afternoon, I’m going to be spending some time working on my RMBC Course…

Which launched at the end of April.

Hope you all have a great day 🙂

– SPG

P.S. Laura’s celebrity crush has been Leonardo DiCaprio since she was 13 years old and saw Titanic.

In addition to Leo, she also likes James Franco.

And then on the flip side, she’s also into pro-wrestler looking guys with long hair and unshaven faces. 

It’s quite the contrast…

But, the point is that all of her crushes look NOTHING like me at all…

Which is another thing I frequently enjoy teasing her about.

P.P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

The post I Love Selena Gomez first appeared on Stefan Georgi.

One of the advantages of having written hundreds of health promos for supplements…

Is that I have a really good picture of which ingredients and remedies are legit…

And which ones aren’t. 

I’m not claiming to be a doctor or a scientist here or anything…

But, I would say I’m more knowledgeable about this stuff than the vast majority of the population…

Because I’ve easily read over 10,000 scientific studies in the last six years or so. 

Anyways, why am I bringing this up?

Because I want to share the products/ingredients that I personally believe in…

And that I take regularly, along with when I get sick or I’m fighting something off.

I’m writing this today, because yesterday, I was sick as a dog…

With a stomach bug that was causing me to throw up for much of the morning…

Along with a fever that hit 102 F and led to a bunch of painful body aches.

Today, I feel about 95% and I’m writing this from my office. 

I think that’s a pretty good turnaround…

And, it’s not an isolated incident…

Back in early November, there was a stomach bug going around Las Vegas.

Laura had it for five days…

The CEO of our Call Center had it for five days…

A ton of our employees had it for anywhere from three to seven days…

I had it for less than 24 hours. 

So, maybe you believe in supplements and natural stuff, or maybe you don’t…

But for me, this stuff works.

And, given we’re in the height of cold/flu season…

I wanted to share some of my top things. 

1. Greens

I personally use the Amazing Grass Green Superfood. I only started taking this product in the last 6 months or so, but it’s been a massive game-changer for me. There are too many good ingredients to count, but the ones I most like are organic spirulina and chlorella. 

Multiple human studies have shown both of these ingredients serve as immunomodulators. 

This means they give your immune system a boost when it needs one (ie. your fighting off an infection).

They also tell your immune system to “chill out” when it’s being overactive (which is the hallmark of both inflammation and allergies). 

I normally take one scoop of Amazing Grass in the morning. When I’m sick, I up the dosage. Yesterday, I took two big servings of Amazing Grass and it seems to have made a big difference. 

2. Structured Silver

I’d never really heard of medicinal silver until two years ago, when I did some promos for a new company. When I went through all of the research on it though, it piqued my interest. In particular, I spent hours on the phone with Dr. Gordon Pederson who has three Ph.D.s from Utah State University in Toxicology, Immunology, and Biology. He’s on the board of multiple medical institutions and performed his internship work under Dr. Jonas Salk – the guy who cured polio. 

Dr. Pederson is a powerful advocate of silver as a supplement. Why? It’s antiviral, antimicrobial and antipathogenic.

Silver particles stop viruses and other bad stuff inside your body from replicating. They do this by literally exploding the DNA of those viruses, as well as by rupturing their cell walls. 

Structured silver is a specific type of liquid solution where nanosilver particles are bonded to water. The reason “structured” is important is because this bonding ensures the silver passes through your body and then gets urinated out. This is opposed to other forms of silver (like colloidal) where the silver can build up in your system over time. 

The brand I personally use is My Doctor Suggests. It’s run by my friend Doug Godkin in partnership with Dr. Pedersen. In addition to the liquid silver, they also have a gel which is great as a hand sanitizer or to apply to topical wounds or acne. This gel is also really popular with pet owners, as it gets rid of dermal infections very fast. 

3. Turmeric

It’s telling that even mainstream, super-conservative doctors don’t have any shade to throw on turmeric. It would be hard for them to do though, the clinical studies on turmeric are just too overwhelming to dismiss. 

I mostly take turmeric for its anti-inflammatory and immune-supporting effects. But there are also large-scale studies showing turmeric helps protect your liver, mitigate the effects of heavy metals, promote healthy blood sugar, protect against various forms of arthritis, alleviate IBS, and more. 

One thing that’s important to note – in the majority of the major studies I’ve looked at, you need at least 1,000 mg of turmeric a day to get the max benefits…

So, if you're taking a turmeric supplement currently, it’s worth looking at the dosage and seeing if you’re getting enough. 

The type of turmeric I personally prefer is Gaia Herbs, Turmeric Supreme Extra Strength. 

It comes with 60 capsules, and each capsule has a little over 500mg of turmeric and curcuminoids, along with black pepper for absorption. 

I’ll take two capsules most days, and up to 6 capsules when I feel like I’m coming down with something. 

In addition, some of the other supplements on my list are Beta Glucan (by Better Way health) and a probiotic (Garden of Life 30 BN). 

—

So yeah, I don’t know if this is interesting to most of you guys are not. But, it’s what I felt like writing about today LOL. 

I’m already at my office and about to get to work.

I’ll be finishing up some edits to the sales page for the Copy Accelerator event first…

Then hopefully finishing a blood glucose support sales letter for a client after that. 

Eden is still fighting off her stomach bug too, so I think Laura is going to take her to the doctor later today. Depending on the time of the appointment, I may try to leave and go to attend that as well. 

– SPG

P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

The post Here Are the Supplements I Take When I’m Sick first appeared on Stefan Georgi.

At the start of the previous decade, I was in Pensacola, Florida.

Well, that’s where I spent most of my time…

Though on New Year’s Eve I was in Park City, Utah, at a party with my parents and their friends…

Telling everyone that I was going to law school after I graduated from college.

That was the plan.

I’d taken the LSAT, applied to several law schools, and been accepted at the University of Miami.

It seemed like a perfect fit because I loved the tropical climate of South Florida…

And, being a lawyer – that was prestigious.

Lawyers made lots of money…

So, despite having been a bit “lost” for stretches of my life since turning 18…

(attended CU Boulder for a semester then dropped out, worked a stretch of minimum wage jobs, struggled with both a weed and cocaine addiction, started a music company with raised capital and failed, decided I missed learning and enrolled in Junior College, transferred to UWF, reconnected with nature, discovered philosophy, finally found my place)…

It looked like I’d end up being a respectable member of society after all.

Internally though, I was having my doubts.

I graduated from college in May, of 2010.

And, by June…

I’d written the University of Miami to tell them I wasn’t going to be attending.

Why?

I knew in my heart that I’d be going to law school for all the wrong reasons.

I’d be doing it because being a lawyer “sounded” impressive…

And because they made lots of money…

But I’d probably be miserable.

Especially with the insanely long hours…

And the fact that I just wasn’t all that interested in law.

I also knew there was a good chance I’d drop out of law school before finishing…

And the idea of taking on another $150,000 in debt…

For something, I wasn’t that passionate about…

It wasn’t a risk I wanted to take.

So, I didn’t go.

And, for a time, it seemed like a questionable decision.

I couldn’t find any jobs in Pensacola…

So I ended up working on a failed congressional campaign in Houma, Louisiana…

But left before Election Day.

When the leadership decided we needed to spend less time out in the community…

And more time cold-calling Cajuns to see who they were voting for…

Which meant using an autodialer to make 200-300 phone calls a day from a stuffy room with little AC or natural light.

When I quit, I was told by the campaign director that I would never work in politics again.

But I didn’t care.

And I drove from Houma directly back to San Diego…

Where I moved in with mom and dad…

And started looking for work.

After that happened…

There was a stretch of time where I worked as a promotional model/brand ambassador…

Which I actually did really enjoy…

Except, it wasn’t permanent.

You'd get good pay for a few days, but then the event was over…

And you were back to scrambling for your next gig.

This was followed by my time working at a for-profit, online college…

Where I’d cold call people and try to get them to take on massive amounts of debt to pursue a worthless degree…

Which also didn't feel very good…

Because I knew that, statistically…

Over 80% of the people who I convinced to enroll in the college…

Wouldn’t end up completing their degree program and would just be saddled in debt.

There were stretches of depression…

Then, one of the happiest times of my life.

The four months I spent living in a double-wide trailer in Marble Falls, Texas…

Teaching kids about nature at a place called The Outdoor School.

That was followed by my dad’s cancer diagnosis, death, and more depression…

And then, a fateful trip to Las Vegas after my dad died…

Where I sat down to a poker table…

Met Laura Catella…
And found out what copywriting was for the first time.

Many of you have heard the story by now.

Someone asked her what she did for a living…

She said, “I’m a writer”…

I asked, “what kind of writer?”…

She said, “I’m a copywriter”…

And I said, “that’s awesome.” Then, pulled out my phone and Googled “what’s a copywriter,” because I had no idea.

That was the beginning of a major turning point in my life.

But, it didn’t happen overnight.

First, there was one last corporate job, this one back in South Florida.

Me working on several business ideas that didn’t take off…

And then, me finally trying out “this copywriting thing” for myself…

And realizing people would actually pay me to write for them.

That was the “A-HA!” moment.

And I quit my corporate job less than 30 days after that.

But, it still wasn’t all roses from there…

There were times where I’d have to pawn musical instruments or my Xbox to pay rent…

Tons of mistakes I made (starting an agency then becoming trapped in it)…

Laura and I both doing shady shit behind each other’s backs…

And just more growing up that needed to happen.

Finally, things started to click in 2014 when I began writing for the guys at Lion’s Publishing full-time.

It was only then that I knew I’d developed competency and a skill-set that would ensure I’d never be broke again.

And after that, there was a health supplement company that went from $0 to $23MM in two years…

Several other successful brands I partnered in…

Then more recently, Copy Accelerator with Justin Goff…

Creating this email list…

Starting to teach more…

Marrying Laura…

And the birth of our beautiful daughter, Eden Rose.

Plus more mistakes too.

Don’t think the mistakes stopped after 2014 LOL…

I've continued to make plenty…

Including the affiliate network, I created in 2017, thinking I was genius…

And that's cost me at least $1.5 MM between 2017-2019.

I'll give you a whole email about that damned affiliate network at some point…

But, the point is…

It's been quite the decade.

And I guess I'm just feeling sentimental and wanted to write about it.

I also want to make the point that nothing is permanent…

And while it can feel like things aren’t moving in the right direction, or like you’re stuck…

The truth is that change is the only constant.

A single year can be impactful…

But a decade?

You’re virtually guaranteed not to be the same person at the end of a decade as you were at the start.

And, for me personally…

I’m so thankful for the last decade.

Even with all of the ups and downs…

Because this last decade is where I finally became a fully realized human being…

Where I went from an unguided missile…

To a mission-driven man.

Of course, I'll still continue to evolve…

I have no doubt that there will be numerous lessons I'll need to learn in the new decade as well – some easy but some hard and painful…

And, I can tell you that there are still plenty of areas in my life where I want to improve too.

But I’m entering this decade with a profound sense of confidence…

Along with an unbridled optimism…

And for that, I’m incredibly grateful.

– SPG

P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

The post Reflections on the Last Decade first appeared on Stefan Georgi.

Some of you may know that I was a philosophy major in college…👨‍🎓

But I doubt you know the reason why.

It’s because of a guy named Bobby Johnson.

You see, when I transferred to the University of West Florida in 2008…

I was originally a Political Science Major…

And I was completely content with that decision – I thought politics and government were super interesting.

During that first semester though…

I elected to take an Intro to Ethics course…

And Bobby was the professor.

Bobby was this skinny, shaggy haired kid…

He was only 26 at the time.

And honestly, he looked like he should be a student in the class, not the teacher.👨‍🏫

It was a fairly large class, with a lot of freshmen in it…

And during the very first class…

One of the freshmen – a girl who couldn’t have been much more than 18 – asked Bobby why anyone should study philosophy?

“Well for me, it’s because I’m no longer afraid to die”…

That’s how Bobby responded.

And while yeah, I know it sounds dramatic…

It also caught my attention…

Because I’d never really heard someone talk about death like that before…

Especially not in a way that showed complete peace and acceptance.

So, that moment really stood out…

But, that’s not the reason why I switched to philosophy.

The switch happened when, a month or so into the semester…

I was outside the library, smoking cigarettes with some friends…

And Bobby Johnson came walking by.

He joined us (didn’t smoke, but sat down) and we all talked…

And then at some point it was just me and him, and he goes, “so what’s your deal?”

Well, I had no idea how to answer that…

But I started by telling him that I’m from California…

And I remember him responding with:

“Oh, so that’s why you have good taste in music!”

I'm not 100% sure why he said that – I think he must have been looking through my iPod or something…

And I don’t remember exactly how the rest of the conversation went…

But I do know that Bobby made a pretty impassioned plea for me to study philosophy…

And, at the end of the semester, I made the switch.

So, why am I sharing this with you?

Well, a few reasons…

I think that studying philosophy has helped me to be a better copywriter.

Because it’s all about logical arguments (Want to improve your copy? Read Plato/Socrates – it’s easily digestible dialogue with razor-sharp logical arguments) …

But, it’s also about “weird” arguments and thinking outside the box.

It’s also about trying to find concrete ways to explain very abstract concepts…

Which comes in handy when you’re trying to make mitochondria or autophagy sound interesting to people.

More importantly than that though…

Because I chose to study philosophy…

I basically got to spend two years examining myself, who I really was, and why I did the things I did…

And I spent dozens of hours each week…

Meditating and writing about “big” topics like love, eternity, God, morality, and death.

I think that really helped me in 2011…

When my dad was diagnosed with cancer…

And died five months after.

It was an awful experience…

But because I had spent so much time thinking about the inevitability of death…

And how we only have a finite amount of time on this earth…

It made the diagnosis and death of my father less shocking.

Not easier…

But I wasn’t blindsided.

And, I think if you can get to a place where you're comfortable with the idea of death…

It can make a big impact in your life too.

Because here’s the cold hard truth:

We’re all going to die.

Every single one of us.

And every person we love.

So, we can either accept that fact…

And use it to empower ourselves and others…

By trying to savor every moment of this life…

By trying to spread love to every person we encounter…

By living big, bold, and fully…

Or, we can live in fear and denial.

We can pretend death doesn’t exist…

We can tell ourselves NOT to enjoy anything today, because there’s some undefined time in the distant future where we’ll actually ALLOW ourselves to be happy…

We can slave away in jobs we hate, stay stuck in relationships with people we don't love, and continue to hide our true nature from the world because we’re afraid…

Or, we can view life as a beautiful and thrilling journey, one that we’re grateful to be a part of.

It’s really an either/or situation.

Either you embrace the inevitability of death, and you make the most of the time you’ve got…

Or you don’t, and you die surprised and disappointed.

So, knowing that you have this choice…

Why the F**K would pick option “b”?

Man…

Honestly, as I’m writing this…

I have to be real with you:

It’s been a while since I thought this way…

Since I’ve pondered my own mortality.

Or since I’ve remembered that my eventual death is one of the greatest gifts I have in this life.

There's no better motivator than knowing the cosmic stopwatch will eventually hit 0:00…

It’s a motivator not just to “accomplish” great things…

But to ENJOY as many moments as you can too.

Because it could all be over in the blink of an eye.

That’s how it was for Bobby Johnson.

You see, during my two years at the University of West Florida, we grew pretty close…

I’d take whatever classes he taught…

But I’d also go over to his house for potlucks and get-togethers.

These would inevitably end with all of us on Bobby’s patio at 2 am…

Drinking beer and talking about the meaning of life.

As we grew closer, I learned that Bobby had cystic fibrosis…

And while it didn’t seem to be affecting Bobby a lot at the time…

Sure enough, in 2014…

Bobby passed away due to complications from his disease.

I wasn’t expecting the news…

Because to be honest, we hadn’t talked much since I left UWF…

But when I first heard of Bobby’s passing…

As heartbroken as I was…

I also couldn’t help but think back to that first class, on my first day at UWF…

When Bobby told that girl that he was no longer afraid to die.

And it made me smile.

Suddenly, that comment from Bobby made a lot more sense to me…

Because while no one in the class knew it…

Bobby knew it:

He would almost certainly die at a very young age…

And so, he used philosophy to come to terms with that reality.

To be at peace with his life and his death.

And it worked.

Bobby was hands-down one of the happiest guys I ever knew.

I hadn’t thought of Bobby in a few years…

But he came up last night when Laura and I were at dinner.

And I wanted to write and share this with you…

Because by sharing the lessons I learned, thanks to Bobby…

It’s a way to ensure that he continues to have an impact on people’s lives…

And that his spirit lives on.

Hope you guys have an incredible day 🙂

-SPG

P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

The post I’m No Longer Afraid to Die first appeared on Stefan Georgi.

Yesterday I was talking with one of my private coaching clients about a challenge he’s facing.

He recently moved into a new, larger house…

And, since the move…

His girlfriend (who is Colombian) has been inviting her family over to stay with them constantly.

Now my client loves his girlfriend and her family…

And he truly admires the fact that family is so important to them…

But when her family is constantly coming over unannounced…

And staying for weeks at a time…

It’s disruptive to his workflow and rhythm.

The good news…

Is that in the past, my client would have let this situation lead to a big fight with his significant other…

But because of our work together…

He recognized what was happening, and was able to communicate his feelings with her…

And while she didn’t understand where he was coming from (to her, family is EVERYTHING)…

She was at least able to appreciate what he was saying…

And she agreed to communicate with him so that he knows in advance when her family is going to be visiting…

Along with when they’ll be leaving.

It’s a great start…

But my client was still having anxiety…

Because, as he explained to me…

When his girlfriend’s family is in town…

He seems to always get “dragged” into things.

For example – they’ll say they want to just go grab a quick dinner…

But then, before he knows it…

Dinner has turned into walking around downtown, going to a Latin club, and dancing until 3 am in the morning.

This happens pretty often…

But hey, what can the guy do, right?

The answer is, actually a LOT.

You see, here’s what I explained to my client:

The problem isn’t his girlfriend and her cousins/aunts/sisters/whoever turning a “quick dinner” into an all-night salsa party…

The problem is that he KNOWS in advance this is going to happen…

Yet he still tells himself that this “should” be a quick bite…

Then gets pissed off or resentful when it’s not.

That’s on him, not her.

And because he’s creating a state of cognitive dissonance in his mind…

He’s creating this conflict between his ideal and the reality.

Reality tends to win…

So by going into these situations with unrealistic expectations…

All my client is doing is saying “hey, I want to be disappointed”…

Then, sure enough, he is…

And it leads to completely unnecessary conflicts and feelings of stress.

Here’s how he can fix this…

The “magic bullet” to all of my client’s issues is one simple thing…

Commitment.

You see…

My client needs to be 100% committed to anything he’s doing in life…

But right now, he’s not.

Instead, when my client goes out to dinner with his girlfriend and her family…

He’s half-committed…

Because he’s saying “okay” to eating…

But he’s saying “no” to what will inevitably come after.

As a result of this, he feels anxious the whole time…

And I imagine that this is the conversation going on inside his head:

“I really hope it’s just dinner this time. Are they going to want to go dancing again? I told myself I was going to work later tonight, but if they go dancing I’m not going to get that work done. Why does she always do this to me?”

That’s the self-talk of a half-committed man…

And it’s inherently stressful, right?

What my client needs to do instead…

Is be 100% committed not just to dinner, but to spending the entire night with his girlfriend and her family.

That way, before they’ve even left his house…

He’s already fully accepted that he may not come home until 3 am in the morning…

He knows that he’s not going to get any more work done later that night…

And he’s completely fine with that fact.

Maybe this sounds simple – but it’s a game-changer…

Because now my client can actually enjoy this time with his significant other…

Instead of being “half-present,” with his mind preoccupied by all of the other things he should be doing.

Does that make sense?

Now, there’s one more important part to this as well…

Which is that this 100% commitment thing goes both ways.

There are going to be times when my client has to get a project done…

Or where he really needs some alone time to recharge.

In those cases, he should just tell his GF that he’s going to skip on going out with her and her family…

And then he should 100% commit to that decision, rather than feel guilty about not joining them.

As I explained to my client…

If he presents this to his significant other in the right way…

It should actually strengthen their relationship too…

Because what he’s essentially telling her is:

“When we’re together, I want to be fully and 100% present. I don’t want to be distracted or irritable. You may have noticed that I am this way sometimes, and I’m making a commitment to change that. I’m really excited for this, because it’s going to lead to us spending much higher quality time together, and having a lot more fun!

On the other side though, there are certain times where I really need to work. Or where, honestly, I really just need some downtime so I can recharge. In those cases, and when I make that decision, I just want you to respect that as well. Especially because when I do say “no” to going out with you and your family, it’s so that in the future, when I say “yes” I am able to be 100% present and all-in on this quality time.”

I’m pretty sure his girlfriend is going to understand where he’s coming from…

Because now, the way we’ve reframed this is that it’s no longer all about “him”…

It’s about their relationship.

And so, when he does tell her he wants downtime, or says no…

He’s not being selfish or unfun in his girlfriend’s eyes…

He’s making an investment in THEM.

Okay, that’s all I’ve got for this morning…

But hopefully you guys find this as interesting as I do.

– SPG

P.S. I warned y’all I’m long winded. I’d love to tell you I’ll be less verbose in the future… But that’s something I simply can’t commit too 😛

P.P.S. If you know anyone who you think should be reading this, please feel free to forward this to them. You can also share this link with them, which is where they can apply to opt-in.

The post Why Being “Half-Committed” Makes You Miserable first appeared on Stefan Georgi.

So, I just took Tuesday through Monday off.

That’s the longest stretch of “off time” I’ve taken in quite some time.

In full transparency, during this stretch I did still do a few little things here and there, like respond to messages or look over something real quick…

But I’d say total I worked less than 60 minutes each day, and it was mostly in the morning before my family was awake.

Taking the time off was great in general…

But, what’s really interesting (at least to me) …

Is how this off time made me reevaluate my approach to spending time with my daughter.

In Las Vegas we have a nanny. Which is a big convenience, but it also has drawbacks.

What I’ve found is when you’ve got a nanny who is always available – you take advantage of that. You work longer hours, or go out more often, etc. Which is fine, but then you end up sacrificing family time.

Generally, when I’m in Las Vegas, here’s what my schedule looks like during weekdays:

I leave for my office before my daughter is awake (usually around 6:30 am) and I come home between 4:30 and 5:30 pm.

My daughter goes to bed around 7:30 pm, so that does still give me a few solid hours with her…

And on weekends, my wife and I will generally spend most of the day with our daughter – but we’ll also often go out Saturday in the later afternoon or evening and have the nanny come and put her to bed.

In contrast to this…

The last week there was no nanny. We were in Palm Springs and then we were in San Diego. And it was fantastic.

Every morning, my wife and I would wake up our daughter together…

Each afternoon, we’d put her down for her nap together….

And each night, we’d put her down for bed together.

Meanwhile, throughout the day, we’d be taking her to different places, spending time outside, playing with her, and getting a ton of hugs.

What’s really fascinating, is that when I’m in Vegas…

I often find myself feeling exhausted when I’m spending time in the evenings with my daughter (during weekdays)…

And during the weekends when we spend all day with her – those days can feel really long too, and kind of wear me down.

Conversely, though…

In this last week, even though I was spending all day with my daughter, I didn’t feel run down even once.

We had a great time, the days flew by, it was really fantastic.

I’m trying to figure out why…

And my best guess as of now is that when I’m in my normal routine, I’m more distracted. I’m thinking about work and my different ventures. There are emails or messages I feel like I should be responding to. So even though I’m with my daughter, I’m not entirely “with her” some of the time.

And I want to change that.

Just being in my office today, I miss her. I can’t wait to see her again. And I don’t want that feeling to go away.

So, one of the things I’m going to be working on in the coming months is figuring out how to reconfigure my life to be even more present with my little girl.

I’m already pretty good at not being hyper-responsive to messages, or being knocked off course by a random late-night email, etc. But it seems like I could be even better…

But beyond that, I’m also thinking about how I could probably be working less hours too. This doesn’t have to mean I won’t get as much done either.

Instead I’m thinking that a lot of weekdays, I could probably start working at 6 am, and be done by 2:30 pm (which is when she gets up from her afternoon nap).

I could also probably take more weekdays off without it affecting my businesses in any major way…

So, these are things I’m going to be working on.

P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

The post How Taking Time Off Has Me Determined To Be A Better Father first appeared on Stefan Georgi.