How Ivan Screwed Up His “Pitch” To Me (Great Lesson)

Yo 🙂

Previously, I spent a few minutes going through my LinkedIn Messages…📩

And there was one in particular that really stood out. 🧐

It was a cold “solicitation” email from a young guy named Ivan who was looking for work. 

Now I get solicited a lot, but Ivan’s message was pretty well written…👌

He had a decent opening line:

“A desperate attempt to help you make money” (Immediate action required)

It was personalized from the beginning with my name and other details…

“Dear Stefan…”
“I’ve watched videos talking about how you and Justin get constant messages from people looking for copywriters.”
“I’m using the 3-email method that you and Justin suggest”…

Etc. 

And he even had some bullets/promises at the beginning of his message, regarding what would be inside: 

“In this brief message, I wanna tell you: 

  • Why this crazy cold message is important to you
  • How you can get something in return if you help me
  • The main reason I am doing this.”

Okay, so not the world’s most curiosity inducing fascinations here…

But still, kind of a unique way that he laid things out.

Ivan also gave a fairly compelling reason for why he was hitting me up…

He’s an international college student here in the U.S., his tuition is expensive, and it’s due at the end of the month. 

That means he needs to come up with around $10,000 to pay his tuition, and that’s where I come in. 

So far so good…

But then here’s where Ivan messed up (and it’s a place where a lot of us screw up too):

He didn’t give me the right offer. 

You see, here’s the “ask” in Ivan’s own words:

“I don’t want to ask you to work for free or anything like that (I know that would involve extra work for you). The only thing I’m asking is if you could introduce me to 5 clients that I can write their Sales pages/Emails for them. 

Why 5?…

Glad you asked. It’s mainly because by charging a normal investment of $2,000 – $2,500 to each client, I would be able to pay my tuition on time and won’t get kicked out of studying in the university any longer (I’ve already missed some terms in the last year)….”

Then Ivan goes on to say that if I helped him…

“I would want to give you 10% of my earnings from what I get from those clients for a full year!!”

Okay, so what’s wrong with Ivan’s offer?

A few things.

For one thing, finding 5 high paying clients for someone is not easy, even if you’re super connected like me. 

I’m able to find people in my masterminds/programs opportunities regularly, but to go out and just get this guy 5 new clients would actually be a lot of work… 

And I’m not sure why I would do that when I’ve got other people in my mastermind or bought RMBC, who are also looking for jobs. 

Whether it’s fair or not, folks who buy my stuff typically go to the front of the line. 

Makes sense right…

But that’s still actually not the #1 reason Ivan got his offer wrong. 

The #1 reason this isn’t a good offer is as follows: 

I don’t know Ivan at all! 

That’s the biggest thing. 

We buy from people we know and trust. And we help the people we know and trust too. 

As I was reading Ivan’s pitch to me, the number one thing going through my head was:

“What if I referred Ivan to 5 people I know, they hire him and pay him, and then he doesn’t do the work?” 

If that happens, then it looks bad on me! 

Suddenly, I’ve squandered my social capital with colleagues and peers…

I get egg on my face…

And it makes it less likely that those people will hire other writers when I refer them in the future…

Which in turn could negatively affect people in my mastermind, who bought RMBC, or who I just happen to know and trust. 

Does that make sense?

One of the biggest fears of almost all people is being made to look a fool. 

So an offer like Ivan’s fails because it creates too high of a possibility (real or imagined) that the prospect could look dumb. 

As a result, if I were Ivan…

I’d figure out what I can offer for $5k…

Then I’d aggressively target clients who I think can pay it…

Because it’s way easier to get 2 clients than it is 5…

Especially if your offer is dialed in. 

– SPG

P.S. This post originally came from an email I sent to my private list. If you want to see more stuff like this from me, you can apply to join my list using this link.

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